Thursday 10 March 2011

5 things that WILL happen to you when you take on a pub...

1)   You will CRAVE sleep. You will sleep standing up pushing your trolley around the Cash n Carry.  You will nip upstairs and sleep on your desk inbetween pulling pints.  You will even fall asleep mid-sentence while talking in a room full of people (thanks Dad) You will talk about sleep A LOT and become totally paranoid when setting your alarm clock for the next day. Only 5 hrs 15 minutes??? What?? I have to be up in a minute!! - Learn to take the breaks when they are there... Forget the washing - Go Sleep!

2)   You will learn to listen to Bullsh*t over the bar, and know exactly when to nod and smile, whilst in a land far away.. thinking what you're going to make for dinner, and how you are going to get your accounts in on time. - Remember to Nod & Smile in the right places... these are your precious customers!

3)  You will drive yourself crazy fretting over your accounts and will find yourself swimming in a sea of paperwork quicker than you can say 'Pint of Bitter please'  - Get a System... FAST!

4) You will eat out at other pubs, and take sneaky photographs on your Blackberry of their Menu... just to 'check' you're doing things right.  During the same meal, you will also keep a close eye on the landlord and say things like .. "He's stressing... quick look look!  He's Stressing! Thats what we must look like all the time.. "  ..... ENJOY your days off!

It is COMPULSORY to enjoy cocktails on your day off.. 

5) You will come to know and love your locals... sometimes itching to open the doors just to hear the latest 'Word on the Street' or to hear their latest Love Saga's .......... LOVE your Locals!

Keep Smiling!
The Yew Tree

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